Five Mistakes
by IcySweetXIII
Summary: What happens when Itachi loses his nail polish? read and find out… please r


Five Mistakes 

Rated: K

Summary: What happens when Itachi loses his nail polish? read and find out… please r&r

disclaimer: oh for god's sake… I don't own naruto or any of its characters…

I tried to make it funny… sweatdrop sorry….

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First, Itachi was nervous. Hysterically, insanely nervous.

"Kisame, you haven't seen my nail polish anywhere lately, have you?" he asked indifferently. Kisame was surprised. No, more than surprised. This was a desperate measure on Itachi's terms – actually asking someone for help? Preposterous!

"No." Kisame decided not to snicker, for fear of having his head chopped off.

"I thought not," Itachi muttered to himself. Muttering to himself! Yes, for Itachi, this was hysterically, insanely nervous.

Next, Itachi was murderous. (You thought he was scary before!)

The 15-year-old girl at the counter of the empty beauty shop made the last 5 mistakes of her life the day Itachi walked into her store. She was filing her nails and overall looking very bored and snooty when Itachi asked her where the nail polish was (rather scarily, she thought). She cocked her eyebrow at him and pointed to the back of the room. In her opinion, he walked in that direction just a little too quickly to be natural. She shrugged at no one and continued filing her nails, without even noticing his coming back.

"Excuse me, where do you keep your barrels?" he said with that sort of deadly you're-wasting-my-time-so-hurry-up-and-tell-me-so-I-can-kill-you look he often wore. She also noticed his eye was slightly twitching, and that his clothes were extremely disheveled.

"Barrels of what, exactly?" she asked, completely unfazed.

"Nail polish of course," he said, almost – _almost_ – exasperatedly.

She couldn't help it, so she made her first mistake. She laughed and laughed, until she saw that he was clearly _not_ kidding. She cleared her throat.

I'm sorry sir, I'm afraid we don't carry nail polish in barrels," she replied in the most dignified tone she could muster. "If there's anything else –"

"I demand to talk to your manager. Now." Oh, yes. His voice was definitely cracking, and his eye twitched more than ever now.

Her expression turned instantly icy as she made her second mistake – she defied Itachi. "Look, I don't know what your deal is, but talking to my boss isn't going to help, and I'm not bringing her out."

"Bring me the manager or I'll kill you." _Not that I wouldn't have killed you anyway, _he thought to himself.

She then made her third mistake. She snorted. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, she actually _snorted _in the face of Uchiha Itachi – S-Class missing ninja.

"Who do you think you are, anyway? Some S-Class missing ninja?" She looked him up and down, taking in his features and again noticing how completely out-of-it he looked. Suddenly her eyes widened in realization and she clapped her hand over her mouth. "Oh. My. God. You're that asylum escapee, aren't you? You are!" What an idiot. That was her fourth mistake. She screamed and backed away. What are you gonna do with all that _stupid _nail polish anyway, you freak!"

Oh, no. That was it. Nobody – _nobody _– insulted Uchiha Itachi's nail polish. (That idiot girl just couldn't stop running her mouth, could she? Tsk, tsk. Ah well, that makes five mistakes.) He snapped. Went _completely _insane. He screamed, pounded on his chest like some forest-born Tarzan type of guy and smashed all the bottles of hair care, nail care, face car, foot care, and nose care on the shelves. So basically, he trashed the place.

Needless to say, the snooty 15-year-old and everyone in the back room were found dead, later. There was blood everywhere, and ironically, it seemed he had slashed open her chest and poured nail polish in her wound. (Before she was really dead.) Yay.

Oh yeah! Itachi eventually found his nail polish, and everyone at the Akatsuki was relieved. The End.

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wow… the ending is kind of pathetic, isn't it? oh well. if you have any suggestions, please review… thanks for reading! 


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